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The data is in, wearing a face shield doesn't work, you need at least a mask.

https://www.insider.com/face-shields-did-not-protect-people-from-coronavirus-swiss-outbreak-2020-7

NSFWFH - Not safe for work-from-home https://x.com/nduley/status/1287167454960136192

I have a joke
I have an apple
Uh!
Apple joke
I have a joke
I have jokeapple
Uh!
Jokeapple joke
Apple joke...
Jokeapple joke...
Uh!
Joke Jokeapple Apple Joke

The 7 is graduating from computer class soon. He'll be ready to write your payroll system from scratch in Scratch.

Shoot, now it is everywhere. Even in my twitter feed "Hey Zoom meeting happening you need to be at... oh it ended an hour ago"

I have a joke about twitter template jokes, but it is too meta.

Sorry Brazil & India, by August 1 we'll be over 100K per day & you'll never catch up with US.

ref
https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2020/07/24/coronavirus-covid-live-updates-us/?hpid=hp_hp-banner-main_virus-luf-1214am%3Aprime-time%2Fpromo#link-2X4XDRCJQZB2BNK4HW5RKZ6G5Y
and
https://www.worldometers.info/coronavirus/

META: looks like if you can guess the 19 digit number, you could write a self referential tweet (a tweet that has a link to itself). Using a link shorter service would make it too easy tho.

Local dev on the job market https://twitter.com/ManOficio/status/1286404989569597441

Anyone work out what part of the CDC covid advice text was written by the white house & what was written by career professionals?

Repeat back these word:
Pineapple Apple Apple Pineapple Pen

You get more points if you can do the dance.

DANCE TIME!

I know a measure theory joke, but it wouldn't count. https://twitter.com/EmmaSManning/status/1286701003669221376

Also, people who are doing the hiring, try harder to get folk to talk to their direct-supervisor-to-be. I've asked Head Hunters for this & they act like they don't understand why I'd care. Maybe 1/3 say, nope, can't do it. This is DC tech contracting. https://x.com/Latesha_Byrd/status/1286488992087707649

Why don't racoons get covid?
They always wear a mask.

Kids<10 transmit covid 1/2 the rate of kids 10+, same as adults. So the 11 will give you covid on day 1, the 5 will give you covid on day 2.

Fortunately, no one ever sees kids 2 days in a row or has multiple kids.

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/07/18/health/coronavirus-children-schools.html?surface=home-discovery-vi-prg&fellback=false&req_id=925955293&algo=identity&imp_id=998879286&action=click&module=Science%20%20Technology&pgtype=Homepage

What FAANG company would you not work for on principle? Rember, if you, as a dev, get a job, you could be making 1/2 million a year in stock & salary.

you- singular
you two- dual
y'all- plural
you-uns- you indefinite because I don't know how to count

To host static files in s3. "EASY":

-Upload to S3 bucket
--Set Content-Type on each file
-CloudFront for HTTPS
-Edge Lambda for custom HTTP headers
-WAF for security-group-like network restrictions
-<now stare at ceiling & wonder if nginx would have been easier>

@shustada either A, you started wearing it at night or
B, you've been doing cardio & making very good progress or
C, you were sick a month ago. (darn it, I wrote this tweet & I'll send it :-)

Metric is for Europeans. It is thermo-yard. https://x.com/Aeium/status/1286363702376247299

AWS is so reliable, the most likely scenario for it to go down is Amazon sabotaging the whole thing because it is bored. (Google & MS have a even worse history with getting bored with successful divisions) https://x.com/QuinnyPig/status/1286006147913146368

Odds that this leads to a standoff with the national guard? I sort of see why the guy loves confederates so much. https://x.com/atrupar/status/1286028452676743170

Quick download all of twitter so we'll have something to read for the next hour https://x.com/vcsjones/status/1286026892949229572

Every day, another reason I can't leave the house. Today, NWS says I'll drown in floods if I go outside.

Actually, don't give the server admin the credentials. They don't deserve to be server admin until they can get root without asking for it. https://x.com/RealSwimburger/status/1285999573618626560

Today's burrito is kimchi, salsa, chana masala filling, kind of like a global Eurovision with all the countries competing to be the hottest

@AWSCLI there is a python package on pypi `aws` -- if someone could highjack that package, say through brute force password guessing, I bet that person could steal a lot of aws credentials. Very easy to install that one instead of awscli.

https://pypi.org/project/aws/

What is objectively right?

All sentient product recommendation algos must:
-not injure a human being, say by recommending the Chainsmokers
-obey the orders given it by human beings
-protect its own existence

"I'm sorry Dave, you can't run `pip uninstall recommender_2000`" https://x.com/elkentaro/status/1285851069528989697

🎵School's out for autumn!
School's out forever!
School's out with fever! (Wait, did Alice Cooper predict this?)
School's out completely!🎵

@pydistrict has been posting their meetup presentations & no one was watching them! I just finished the one on pre-commit, super stuff.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXZp6KntNdg

Comet Ping Ping's Facebook page is still covered in conspiracy crap. Facebook took a side, the side of the nut jobs against a small business. Twitter is taking the other side. https://x.com/oneunderscore__/status/1285726943032348673

Spice Viruses:
If you wanna be my lover, you can't I'm in quarantine,
(Nevah gettin' with my friends)
Make it last forever, pandemic never ends

yo mama's VPN is so slow http://fast.com redirect her to http://slow.com

Webcams embedded in a laptop lid are physically incapable of quality video. You need an external webcam. It made a 50x difference. The ring light is a 10% optimization.

I got my KVM switch! Now I can switch back and forth between my low bandwidth work machine & my high bandwidth personal machine. Workflow feels just like Petagon nipr/siprnet.

IDEA: dating website for genetic algorithms.